The Final Stretch

As I’ve mentioned before, blogging consistently is definitely not my strong suit. Sorry! I’ve been in Nicaragua for eight weeks now, so now I’m in the final stretch. I guess I’ve got a lot to catch you all up on since it’s been oh I don't know, 6 weeks or so since I last posted on here, so ima just put it in sections for you:

Work at Fundación Fénix: I’ve been teaching English to high schoolers in the mornings, but attendance has gradually dwindled down. Now it’s gotten to the point where it looks like the students aren’t going to come anymore due to several different reasons outside of my control, but it’s alright because we have a lot to do in these last couple weeks. English classes with the preschoolers in the afternoon is fun but exhausting, so I’m glad that’s only two days a week. I think we’re going to try to have a little graduation ceremony for them in the last week with caps and everything :) I’ve been getting a lot more involved in the microfinance program over the past few weeks, which is good since that’s what I came here for after all. We’ve been doing case studies on new women who want to enter the program. We lend money in small amounts to women who wouldn’t be able to get a loan from a bank because they don’t have collateral or can’t pay the high interest rates, and the case studies are interviews and visits to their house/business that we do to figure out if they’ll actually be able to pay back the loan. Rather than coming to your house to take away your possessions if you don’t pay, the program is set up so that the women are in groups of three or four, and if one person doesn’t pay then the others can’t continue to borrow. It’s a very interesting (and effective) system, and one of the coolest things about the program is that my bosses, Licenciada Torres and Licenciada Karla (Licenciado/a is just a title for a person with a college degree) really emphasize the fact that they’re not just a bank. They don’t just loan money; they focus on educating the women and developing the community. They even work with the women in their personal and family issues (Lic. Torres is a social worker and Lic. Karla is a clinical psychologist, so they’re pretty well qualified for the role they’re in). We’re also getting close to being able to make our first batch of samples with the encurtidos and the other products with the label and everything, so hopefully we’ll be able to do that before I leave. We got an $800 grant approved through FSD to help with the product commercialization, which is AWESOME! I was pretty stressed because the directors didn't get me the information I needed for the grant proposal until very close to the deadline so it was very rough and I even had a mistake in the project title, so all credit goes to God for it somehow getting approved!

Midterm Retreat in San Juan del Sur: FSD (the organization I came here through) puts together a little midterm retreat for interns who are here for nine weeks or longer, so we went to the beach town of San Juan del Sur. It’s technically supposed to be a chance for you to evaluate your experience with the other interns and learn from each other, but it was pretty much just a little vacation (which I was completely fine with). We did have a little meeting on the first day to talk business, but the rest of the time was spent relaxing at the beach and going out to eat. San Juan del Sur is apparently pretty famous as a legendary surf spot, so it was extremely interesting to see Central American surfing culture. The surfers act pretty much exactly like the typical surfer stereotype, just with a Latino twist. They act muyyyy tranquiiiiilo and have dreads and talk pretty much exactly like Totally Kyle from the Amanda Show (look it up on Youtube if you don’t know what I’m talking about).

Not only are there a lot of Nicaraguan surfer dudes, but there’s also a buttload of cheles (white people). Now THAT was strange for me. Ciudad Sandino isn’t exactly the biggest attraction Nicaragua has to offer, so I’ve seen around 5 white people total, and they’re normally on mission trips or something similar. In San Juan del Sur, the town was FULL of them! I’m not gonna lie, Americans in Nicaragua can be pretty embarrassing. We passed by some obnoxious girls who said to us in a super strong English accent “Hola!” and we all just kind of stared at them and then they got fake angry because we didn’t answer them. I looked at our bus driver (who was a super cool guy, by the way) and said, “Ayyy, Americanos.. ¡No me gustan para nada!” Don’t worry, I’m still as ‘Murican as it gets, I just get annoyed by loud Americans who give us a bad rep. I kinda see myself as a separate from them because I feel like I know the real Nicaragua. Those gringos probably think a bus where every seat is filled is crowded. I know that if you’re standing in the aisle on a Nicaraguan bus and can move more than 2 inches in any direction, there’s PLENTY of room for more people! I’m always telling the Nicaraguans I know, “Es que no soy gringo, soy nica.” And contrary to Google Translate might tell you with that last sentence, “nica” means Nicaraguan.

So while we were there, we stayed in a hostel that was literally right on the beach. Probably pretty expensive, right? $10 a night. I know what I’m doing next time I go on vacation! The beaches and the scenery were beautiful, and they weren’t crowded at all. It’s pretty much impossible to capture the beauty of the landscape in a photo, so I took some videos too, but that still doesn’t do it justice. Some of these pictures may or may not have been stolen from a guy named Ray that I met there who was doing a three week trip through FSD with some other students from Stanford (they were in a town called Masaya and were invited to the retreat as well).

Masaya: I really needed to do some souvenir shopping, and Masaya is like the artisan handicraft capital of Nicaragua, so I took a day trip there with the other intern in Ciudad Sandino. Our first stop was the Masaya Volcano. We hiked 4km up it (which felt like a LOT more than 4km) only to find out that the trails and things were all closed :( However, there was a gaping crater spewing out smoke, so I suppose that was pretty cool.

After that we got some food at a restaurant called Las Sillas Altas. We weren’t sure what it looked like, but it became pretty obvious when we saw the chairs.

So we got some great food there along with some delicious fruit smoothies and then headed to the market. Masaya’s famous for its handicraft market, but since I’m 100% nica, I knew that you can buy the same products for about a quarter of the price at the municipal market where the locals shop. So we hit up the handicraft market to look around and then headed to the municipal market to actually buy things.

Later we headed to a place called Coyotepe which is a stronghold which was later turned into a prison and is now a tourist attraction. It’s on top of a big hill, so there’s a pretty amazing view from the top.

This is just a flower that I thought was really pretty

Apart from being a place rich in history and boasting of picturesque views of the surrounding countryside, it turns out that Coyotepe is also apparently Nicaragua’s number one makeout spot, as you can tell by the couple awkwardly lying on top of each other on the dome at the 17 second mark of the video. The other lookout dome had another couple doing the exact same thing, so I guess that’s just the thing to do here.

Miscellaneous: So the other day I had my first Nicaraguan cooking lessons. I’ve been asking my host family for a while to teach me to make some comida nicaragüense, and today I was able to finally learn how to make a couple dishes. The first was manuelitas, which are kind of like crepes rolled up with a mixture of cinnamon, sugar, and shaved cheese inside. Now before you start judging thinking that's a weird combo, I’ll just have you know that those manuelitas were DANG good so you best BACK OFF.

Luis and Leonor (who everyone calls "chela" because I guess her skin's a little bit lighter)

The finished product!

I also learned how to make gallo pinto, which is the staple of Nicaraguan food and what I eat 1-2 times a day every day. It’s pretty much just rice and beans cooked together, so it wasn’t too complicated.

Jesus Stuff: Very characteristically of my blog-writing self, I actually wrote this part a few weeks ago. That’s ok though, because it still applies!

I think that I’ve been going about the whole spiritual growth thing wrong for a while now. Not completely wrong, but definitely lacking some crucial parts. First off, I have to be writing down the things I learn. It’s way easier to forget what God teaches me if I don’t record it and look over it every once in a while. Even if it’s not anything groundbreaking, it’s still important to have a clear idea of what I’m learning at the moment. The second area I’ve been lacking in has been applying what I’m learning to my life in concrete, practical ways. Now this may not be possible when I read something like a genealogy in Numbers, but I should always be looking for ways to not just know the truth, but to live the truth.

“Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth”

Psalm 86:11a

“Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it---he will be blessed in what he does.”

James 1:22-25

That stuff about looking in a mirror and immediately forgetting what you look like is way too familiar to me. So often I’ll learn something, and rather than writing it down and figuring out practical ways to apply it to my life, I’ll just pray that day and maybe the next couple of days that God would help me in that area, and then *poof* it’s gone and I don’t think about it anymore. I probably need to write down the stuff I pray about too so that I’m not just praying aimlessly and forgetting the things I’ve asked God to do. Either way, I need to be doing my part and not just expecting God to magically change me into the man he’s created me to be without any effort whatsoever on my end. It’s like when I was struggling with porn (Oh dang, things just got real!). I had to take conscious steps to fight it (talking to my college pastor about it, leaving my door open at all times, etc.) and not just pray that God would just make it all go away. Of course, the key thing is to realize that any precautions I take will do jack squat if I’m not completely relying on God’s power and not my own; however, that doesn’t mean that I don’t have a responsibility. I believe the same thing applies to spiritual growth. Although God’s the one who causes me to grow (1 Corinthians 3:6-7), I have a responsibility to “make every effort” (spoiler alert!) to facilitate that growth. Speaking of making every effort to grow, here’s what I’ve been learning recently!

“For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you fro being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ”

2 Peter 1:5-8

Now, two-weeks-ago Scottie would read this and think, Wow, what a cool verse! I want to grow and be effective and productive in my knowledge of Jesus, so I’ll pray for a few days that God would make these qualities real in my life while I keep them as only vague ideas that sound nice instead of examining myself and seeing how these qualities can actually be developed in my life! But I’m not two-weeks-ago Scottie anymore, so here’s my list of practical ways that I’m going to be working on developing these things in my life (while trusting and acknowledging that only God can make me grow):

Goodness: Help workers at Fénix with their responsibilities

Knowledge: Meditate on God’s word rather than just reading it to know the Bible better, continue to memorize and review scripture

Self-control: Don’t use the computer for several hours in a row, don’t use Facebook more than absolutely necessary

Perseverance: Don’t complain when people frustrate me (I have specific examples, but I’m not going to mention them because that would probably count as complaining ) 

Godliness: Honor God with my time in the morning rather than waiting until the day’s almost over

Brotherly Kindness: Greet people with joy, get to know the brothers and sisters at the local church

Love: Treat the host grandpa with respect (he’s bed-ridden and is a very difficult person that puts a lot of stress on the family), bear with the directors at Fénix when they’re not able to show up, be intentional about spending time with the host family and really getting to know them, treat my English students as human beings and not just students

Ok, that’s all for now. I’m just gonna be honest and say that the chances of me making another blog post after this are preeeeeeetty slim. But hey, you never know! I’ll be back in the good ole US of A in less than two weeks and I’d love to share more about my experiences here if anyone’s interested. Please pray that I would not go on autopilot for these last few days I have here but that I would work hard and love God and love people with all the strength that the Lord gives me. ¡Gracias!

Slow and Steady Finishes the Blog Post

I've been here in Nicaragua for two weeks now, so I thought I should probably update the ole blog (aka Kara told me to update it). I've been working at Fundación Fénix for about a week and a half, and things are going well. I've been teaching English to some high school students in the mornings and then doing microenterprise type stuff in the afternoons (which I'll get into more in a second). There have been some problems with attendance in the English class because the government here is requiring that some of the students do mandatory volunteer work (you figure that one out) teaching illiterate people how to read. Fun fact: part of the anthem of the current political party goes, "Luchamos contra el yankee, enemigo de la humanidad." For those of you who are a little rusty on your Spanish, that means, "We fight against the Yankee, the enemy of humanity." So that makes for an interesting dynamic! There's a lot of stuff the U.S. has done here in Nicaragua that gives a little more credence to that line, but that's a story for another day. Back to English classes!

Even though it's ranged from fifteenish students to three on some days, there are a few that have come every day. There's a trio of guys named Eduardo, Carlos, and Roberto that have come consistently and are pretty awesome. They've been extremely friendly and they're very eager to learn English. Eduardo even has a little booklet that he writes English sentences in with their Spanish translations in his free time, and last time I checked he had around four or five THOUSAND phrases. They're not the only ones who benefit from the class though, because they've been teaching me a ton of Nicaraguan words (although a good bit of those words are kiiiiinda inappropriate). I've had a lot of freedom in what I teach them, so we've had some time to learn some fun phrases as well like "What's crack-a-lackin'?" and "See ya later alligator! In a while crocodile!" Don't worry, I'm teaching them legit English too.

Like I said, I've been doing microenterprise stuff in the afternoons (think "very small business"). The other day I got to help give out loan money to women in the community who sell various things. And as I mentioned in the last blog post, we're in the process of getting some encurtidos (stuff like peppers, onions, and carrots in vinegar) that they produce here sold in a major grocery chain. Right now we're trying to develop a brand/logo/marketing strategy because we'll be talking with the president of the grocery store on Thursday in a business fair type thing. The idea is to market the food as a way you can help support the fight against drugs and human trafficking in Ciudad Sandino. Let me know if you have any ideas!

I've been having a good time with my host family here. The five year old named Luis Alexander has really taken a liking to me/my computer (you'd be amazed by how many times he can watch the exact same episode of Dora la Exploradora and still be entertained), and here's the result of our little photo shoot the other day:

Alexander really likes to dance to "I'm Sexy and I Know It," but I haven't caught it on tape yet. For now, this'll have to do:

So everything that came before this current paragraph was written a little over two weeks ago, but I never got around to finishing the post. It was really because I wanted to build the suspense for all of my loyal blog viewers (aka my mom) and definitely not because of any lack of motivation on my part. Just think of it as the blog version of a Double Stuf Oreo, because you're getting twice the blog for the same low price!

I've been here for just about a month now, and I've settled into things a bit more. I'm doing the English classes still, and attendance is still a problem, but the trio I wrote about earlier is still coming every day so it's good with me. Eduardo is now up to around 17,000 English phrases. That kid is ridiculous! This past week I also started teaching English to preschoolers (about five years old), so that's pretty exciting. It's fun, but it's somewhat equivalent to trying to teach and control a class full of squirrels or something. I've still been working with the organization to develop a brand/logo/marketing strategy for those encurtidos that I talked about in the last post so that we can sell them in a grocery chain called La Colonia (although we weren't able to meet the president like I said before). Here's the rough draft design we've got so far (I've still gotta clean up the drawing a little and make the Fundación Fénix logo a little clearer), let me know if you have any suggestions or advice!

We've also been working to expand the agricultural production here at Fundación Fénix. This project and the encurtidos are both to increase the sustainability of the organization so that they don't have to rely on donations. We took a trip this past Thursday to Rivas to buy some baby plantain, papaya, lemon, orange, etc. trees that we're going to plant. The lady we bought them from is a friend of one of the directors, so she actually just gave them to us and we were able to buy a ton of plants from another store with the money we had left over! (this picture is pre-buying the buttload of extra plants)

While we were in Rivas, we stopped by Lake Nicaragua and got to hang out there for a little while. It's got a beach with the softest sand I've ever felt, and in the middle of the lake are two volcanoes. Pretty intense, right? It's hard to capture something so big in a picture, so I took a little video too (although that still doesn't do it justice).

These are the directors of Fundación Fénix, Ms. Torres and Ms. Karla.

We also stopped by another place that I really liked called La Laguna de Apoyo. It's another one of those things that can't be captured well by pictures/videos, but I tried.

The last things I'll share picture-wise are some photos from a community meeting we had the other day. I have the opportunity to apply for up to $800 in grant money to fund some kind of additional project, so we met with community leaders to identify existing problems and possible solutions. I actually really enjoyed it and am looking forward to seeing what comes from it!

Oh yeah, and this car on the beach in Rivas that looked like it was posing for a commercial:

A few weeks ago, one of the family members graduated from college so we had a graduation party for her on the weekend. A bunch of people were supposed to come (who I didn't know), and I didn't even know the family very well at this point. Now this is a typical Scottie move right here: I can go off to a foreign country by myself for the whole summer and be fine, but give me a common social situation such as going to a party where I don't know many people, and I panic. Makes sense, right? I was stressing out in my room for the hours before the party started thinking of how I was going to feel SO awkward and I would have trouble understanding conversations since it would all be in Spanish and I don't know how to dance Latino-style (yet) and all these other things, and as silly as it sounds, I started praying that God would help me. It felt kind of ridiculous to pray for something as trivial as going to a party, but part of my personality is that situations like that really stress me out, so I needed it.

WE INTERRUPT THIS BLOG TO INFORM YOU THAT AN EARTHQUAKE JUST INTERRUPTED MY BLOG! It didn't cause any damage though, so it was actually kind of fun :)

Ok where was I? So after praying about my little pansy boy weaknesses, I went ahead and walked into the living room where the party was. Nothing too exciting happened, just ate some food and talked to one of the family's relatives for about an hour and then went back to my room. But you know what? That was a complete success in my mind. I didn't spend the whole time inwardly criticizing myself and I did something that was out of my comfort zone. When I got back to my room I was just incredibly grateful that God helped me through a situation that I really didn't want to go through. It probably sounds stupid to make such a big deal out of something so small, but I don't really care because it's something I struggle with and God is good. I started reading through some Psalms and read verses like these:

"Keep me safe, O God, for in you I take refuge. I said to the LORD, 'You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing.'"

"I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken."

"I love you, O LORD, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise."

So a night that I was dreading ended up turning into a pretty beautiful time of worship for me. Like I said, God is good.

The Lord's been teaching me a lot of things over the past few weeks. He's been convicting me about the times that I read the Bible just to know the Bible better and not its Author. I'm trying to focus on not just skimming over things so that I can remember them better, but instead meditating on them so that they might change me and so that I might know God better. I'm excited because from the beginning I've thought this was going to be a summer in which I do a lot of growing, and (God willing) it looks like that just might happen. Please pray that I would really stick with what God is teaching me and not allow myself to be lazy or get distracted, and also that God would open up doors for me to share my faith with the people I've met here (and that I would be faithful when those opportunities arise). Also, please let me know if any of you have things I can be praying for! Well my eyes hurt from looking at the screen so long for this dang blog post so I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY KARA! ¡Hasta luego!

Escribo Palabras en Español Cuando No Tengo un Buen Título

Well, it looks like it's that time again. What time, you ask? Time for me to get everyone mad at me by going off to a Latin American country for several months at a time, of course! DEAL WITH IT! I decided to do an internship in Nicaragua with the Foundation for Sustainable Development (FSD), an organization that works to combat poverty/malnutrition/pretty much everything else that's bad in third world countries. The difference, though, is that they're all about sustainable solutions. We tend to think as Americans that to beat poverty we can just give money or spend a week feeding some poor children or something. Please don't get me wrong, I really think that those are wonderful things and I support them, but we can't be naïve and think that it will always be that simple (although sometimes it is). Poverty is a complex issue, and sometimes immediate aid and relief is needed, and sometimes longer-term work needs to be done to bring about development. It's basically like the whole give a man a fish vs. teaching him to fish idea. Again, I think that giving people fish is AWESOME, but we can't trick ourselves into thinking that nothing else is needed. So FSD works with grassroots organizations in the third-world countries to do work that will continue after the interns have left. They focus on empowering local residents rather than just giving quick fixes (although a quick fix can be what is necessary sometimes, e.g. the story of the good Samaritan [can you tell that I'm really trying not to offend people?]).

Ok so now that I've given that nice ole introduction to my introduction, I'll get on to the good stuff. I arrived in Nicaragua last Saturday and waited around in the airport for twenty minutes thinking I was going to be stranded alone in a foreign country because my ride was late (on-time is a pretty loose concept in Nicaragua). However, I got picked up eventually and was taken a food court to eat some comida nicaragüense (warning: you might want to have Google Translate open when you read my blog posts [second warning: I use parentheses way too often]). I had some tajadas (plantain chips) along with some rice, fried chicken, and cheese. After that, we went to the FSD office in the municipality I'm living in, Ciudad Sandino. Here's some documentation of my travels:

There was some time for an orientation, and then I was taken to my host family. I've gotta say, they're pretty rad. It's made up of three generations of family members, so I get the joys of playing games with Alexander (5 years old), hearing life talks from my abuelita, and receiving translations from Spanish to more understandable Spanish done by the adult children when I have no idea what my abuelita is saying! Here are my livin' quarters:

One warning about pictures though: I probably won't have many, at least not at first, because I'm trying not to make myself any more of a target for petty theft than I have to by taking out my fancy digital camera and snapping pictures of everything. That is all.

I've been here for almost a week now, and I'm starting to get settled in. I was assigned to work with an organization called Fundación Fénix. Their website is www.fundacionfenixnicaragua.com if you want to check it out. They do several different programs:
- agricultural projects with children and teens
- drug prevention campaigns
- human trafficking awareness campaigns
- loans and business training for women running micro-empresas
- and much, much more!

So far what it looks like I'll be doing is teaching English to some teenagers and possibly some police as well, going around with the directoras of the organization to help with and learn about micro-enterprise stuff (providing loans at a smaller scale than banks are able to and offering assistance and training in the community), teaching guitar lessons(?), and possibly helping them get the qualifications to get some encurtidos (a topping for food that is made up of various things in vinegar; encurtido literally means "pickled") that the teenagers have produced onto the shelves of a major supermarket.

That's pretty much it for now as far as my activities and such. I do want to say before I get into any Jesus-y stuff that I've got a real problem with caring too much about what people think about me, and that applies with this blog as well. Part of me wants to post things that make people think I'm supa spiritual or wise or whatever, but that's not really good motivation. I'm going to try to be as honest as I can and avoid trying to make myself look good to you folk or exaggerating the impact certain things have had on me just for the sake of having a "God section" in each blog post. Please pray for me about that. Please also be praying that God would help me to fight distraction and actively remember why I'm here (and exist in general), which is to love and glorify Him. It's been very easy for me to get caught up in the busyness of being thrown into a new country with new places and new faces and new responsibilities and blah blah blah so much so that I lose focus on the basics. Ok that's all I feel like writing right now because I've got some gallo pinto and plátanos fritos calling my name in the dining room. ¡Adiós!

Faith and Faithfulness

Good news: I have officially memorized the names of all sixty or seventy kids at the small boys house and all seventy or so of the students that I teach in the high school! Here are some of the small boys:

Above this are Padilla and Elmer, who the boys call "Shrek" because of his unnaturally large belly. Below are Brayan and Cristofer. Brayan is the most adorable little boy in the world, and everyone kind of just lets him do what he wants since he's so cute. He and Cristofer actually just got here about a month and a half ago, but they've both adjusted real well. And more good news: Cristofer finally got his cast off woohoo!

A few weeks ago, I was lucky enough to be part of Emmanuel's first ever quinceañera party.

A quinceañera is a fifteenth birthday party for a girl, and it's a big deal in the Spanish-speaking world. It was thrown for a girl named Mersy who's in one of the classes I teach, and her sponsor paid for everything (dress, food, decorations, etc). Her sponsor was actually here in the volunteer house with me during my first week or so. His name is RJ, and I could tell then that he really cared about the girls he sponsored. The party started off with fourteen couples made up of her closest friends walking in, and then she and her date as the fifteenth couple.

It sounds kind of cheesy, but the party really was heart-warming, and I don't say "heart-warming" very often. Mersy talked to everyone about how even though she didn't have her family here to celebrate with, everyone at Emmanuel had become her new family. Me and the other volunteers acted as waiters and passed out food and cake and refilled drinks and stuff, and we even got to eat some of it too. We had some fried rice and bread, and although I had my doubts about Chinese food from Honduras, it was actually really good. I was also able to get a picture of two of the most adorable girls ever during the party, Yeimy and Yasmin. They're the daughters of a couple of staff members here named Neri and Danny.

I've debated not talking about this for the sake of not having my mom start freaking out, but I've decided to share anyways and just pray that she doesn't go and email Katja, the volunteer coordinator or something hint hint Sharon Finlayson do not email Katja or anyone else. Time for you all to see some of the creepy crawling creatures of Honduras! First off you can meet our pets.

These are some tarantulas that Eric and Michael found in the ditch they were digging for the water pipes. I tried feeding them a moth, but they wouldn't eat it. Unfortunately, they're all dead now. Sad day. We've also had some experiences with scorpions!

This is a scorpion that I killed at 3am the other night when I got up to go to the bathroom. No need to congratulate me, I already know I'm awesome. Eric wasn't so lucky in his first encounter with a scorpion here though because it happened to be in his pants when he put them on, so he got stung two or three times. The last creepy crawly creature is one that I thankfully haven't had any experience with: the torsalo. It's a type of botfly, and it has the nasty habit of laying eggs in human skin. The eggs grow into larvae and it swells up a bunch and you have to pop it out of your skin. I've heard of a lot of kids getting them, and it's pretty nasty looking. I'm hoping I'll continue to be torsalo-free for the rest of my time here.


I've been out of the country for the fourth of July for the past few years and have never been able to celebrate, but this year was different. We all put in about seven or eight dollars and the girl volunteers prepared a scrumptious fourth of July meal for the volunteers and staff. Seriously, it was frickin delicious. The guys grilled hamburgers and hot dogs, there was potato salad, cornbread, banana bread, chips, BBQ baked beans, brownies, and a wonderful concoction called "dump cake."

Everyone wore red, white, and blue, and even Dean (a Danish volunteer) was showing support for America!

Dean took one of the extra shirts here at the volunteer house and gave it a nice patriotic touch by writing things on it like "I <3 U.S." in red sharpie. I must say, Eric also pulled off his DAD shirt preeeeetty nicely. The celebration was really fun, and we all had a 90's nostalgiafest at the end listening to such classic artists as Britney Spears, Aaron Carter, and many more.


All of the volunteers have actually been hanging out a lot more lately, which I'm happy about. We've been doing a lot of bonfires, playing games and stuff, and we've actually started doing a volunteer bible study. I was able to play guitar for some worship songs, and one of us shares what God's putting on his or her heart. I've really enjoyed it and hope we continue to do it. Sorry no pictures though!


This past Wednesday was the birthday of one of the small boys named Julio, so Carol (the volunteer that worked with me in the small boys house for the first month and a half of my stay) and I decided to do something a little special for him. Carol had the idea of taking Julio and his siblings up to the store at the front of Emmanuel to buy them chips and drinks and just let them hang out with each other. Julio also decided to invite Pimba, the boy I talked about in the last post, "because he has a small head." Why that's a reason to invite someone, I don't know, but I was fine with it because I love Pimba. Julio has three other siblings, Oscar (in the pictures in the first post), Carlitos (their older brother who's about 12), and Yensi (one of the girls that was in the clinic in the post I did on June 8th). Yensi is shy but sweet, Carlitos is excellently behaved but still cool enough to have dance parties with me in the laundry room, Oscar is really sweet but tends to misbehave, and Julio is just weird (but in a funny/good way). It was really fun to see them all interact, especially since they're not normally around their sister that often, and Pimba was overjoyed. On the way there, he told me about forty times how excited he was to go to the "menda," which translates from Pimba language to Spanish as tienda, which translates from Spanish to English as "store." They all got their chips and drinks, we shared some ice cream, and we hung out until we had to leave so the kids could go eat lunch at their houses.

One word that's been coming up over and over again in my life is the word "faith." I'm still trying to figure out exactly what God's trying to teach me in all this, so I apologize if this is a bit rough or hard to follow. When we met for the first volunteer bible study, Eric talked about how so often we pray all these things but we don't have faith that God will actually do what we're asking Him. I do that all the time. I ask Him to heal someone who's sick, I ask him to reveal Himself to someone who doesn't know Him, I ask Him to work in me and through me, but so often I just say it with my lips and don't actually believe in my heart that He'll do it. I ask God to do all these things, never fully expecting them to actually happen, and I hate that. Honestly, sometimes it's really easy to just go on autopilot and say a "good-sounding prayer" that I address to God but is really me just talking to myself. I think that's a result of my lack of faith. If I really believed that God would listen to my requests and answer my prayers, I would be praying with so much more focus and sincerity. 

"Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, 'Why couldn't we drive [the demon] out?' He replied, 'Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.'" (Matthew 17:19-21)

"He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all---how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?" (Romans 8:32)

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21)

I think God's continuing this thing He's been doing in my life for the past year where He takes something seemingly simple that I think I understand completely and know everything about and then completely flips it over on me and shows me that I never really understood it with my heart. He did the same thing to me in Peru about realizing the beauty of lost people turning to God for the first time, during fall semester in regard to the power and importance of prayer, during spring semester teaching me to truly love Him with my mind rather than trying to learn apologetics so I don't look stupid or so I can win an argument, and so many other times with other issues. He humbles me and teaches me to understand things with my heart, and he's doing the same thing with the issue of faith right now. I don't get why I have so much difficulty putting faith in God and believing that He listens to me and will answer my prayers if I pray in faith, especially since I've seen Him be so faithful to me in my life already. For example, there was a pretty long period of time early in 2010 where I was just feeling really separated from God. No matter what I did, no matter how much I prayed, I just could not stop feeling utterly lost and incapable of finding God. I remember one time just sitting in my room for a few hours straight in silence begging God to say anything to me. I went to meet with some friends from church at D-group and had to try to hold back tears while I told them I was really scared that I didn't really have a relationship with God. The strange thing is, I don't really remember any huge moment of God appearing to me or anything, but while I was in Peru, I felt close to God and really knew I had a relationship with Him. That's when He started doing this whole reteaching-me-things-I-thought-I-already-knew thing, and ever since last summer I've been steadily growing deeper in my relationship with God, which never happened for any significant amount of time all throughout high school. I now know that it was the Holy Spirit forcing me to feel that loneliness and that separation from God so that I couldn't deceive myself and settle for something that wasn't Him. I don't know if it was that I didn't have a relationship with God before that period of loneliness early last year or if I had just wandered away from God's path, but that's really not all that important to me. All I know is that while I tried in vain to find God, He found me. The song "Late Have I Loved You" by Gungor (based off of the writings of Augustine) pretty much completely describes what happened to me. God promises that "if from there you seek the LORD your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul" (Deuteronomy 4:29). Jesus says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened" (Matthew 7:7-8). I am in a completely different spot right now than I was a little over a year ago, and it's because God is ridiculously faithful to His promises. All that to say this: I've seen God's faithfulness and therefore have no excuse to doubt that He'll be faithful to the promises in those earlier bible verses.

"Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens,

your faithfulness to the skies." (Psalm 35:5)

It's funny, this is nothing close to what I originally intended on writing about in this blog. I guess God had different plans! Well, some prayer requests that I have at the moment would be: that the Lord would continue to teach me about faith and help my faith to grow every day, true humility and a pure heart so that the things I do can actually please God and be for His glory and not my own, and prayer that I would still be effective for His purposes in these last couple weeks here and not be distracted by homesickness or anything like that, so that I can finish the work that God has for me here. Thank you so much, and I'll see you all soon!